Meet Cool Mom #1 :: Nikki Bonifer
You might remember the post about my friend Nikki - you know, the uber mom with a successful career who can cook, sew and grout tile. Well, she inspired a new series where we get to know other Cool Moms a bit better. Because I am always on the lookout for moms who have their act together way more than me.
Thank you Nikki for answering our Mom questions and giving us her 5 Mom Must-Haves. And seriously, how cute are those kids?
Hope you enjoy this series as much as I do. And if you have a Cool Mom that we all need to meet, please shoot me an email!
Wyatt, 3 1/2; Maya 8 months
Feel best about being a mom when
They are so clearly thrilled to see me.
Stopped feeling guilty about
Nothing so far. Really. I've racked my brain and can't honestly own up to something that I've let go of yet.
Favorite family ritual
When we have a "Family Dance Party" after bath time to Ray Charles' You Are My Sunshine
Best family vacation
We're not there yet. We took Wyatt on a cruise with my extended family when he had just turned 1 and was still taking 2 naps a day. Only a good idea if you want to spend a LOT of time in the cabin. In the dark. In silence. Thank goodness we got a balcony room. Anyway, we are refusing to do another vacation until Maya is down to one nap a day. Short weekend trips is it for us for now.
What you miss most about pre-kid life?
The complete luxury of freedom and unplanned time combined. I can have some freedom, and I can have unplanned time. But never together. Anytime I have a gap in responsibilities, there is a known end to it so I feel that I must get as much done possible and make the most of it. Before, I could waste a day that had no agenda or responsibilities and it was no big deal -- there was always some other time to get stuff done. Or there would be more time to lay around later.
How you find time for yourself?
I am not good at this yet. I read for a few minutes every night before conking out. Every few months I have a near breakdown and the hubby takes the kids to his folks house for a day. About once or twice a year, when the kids are at my sister's house, I have the house to myself -- but that method comes with a lot of guilt. My biggest issue is that I work 40 hours (okay, 50) a week and therefore feel like anytime we're all together is precious, so don't want to have the kids gone too much of the weekends.
When I'm at work finishing up the day I feel guilty about not having left to go home yet. And as soon as I leave, I start feeling guilty about all the work I should be doing. When I do work at home, I feel guilty about not focusing on the kids. When I do anything for the kids at work, I feel guilty about not working enough.
What do you see your kids doing that you know they got from you?
Oh man, Wyatt has started to say "I was like...." I HATE THAT! I have to stop NOW.
What do you see your kids doing that you have no idea where they got it?
Wyatt's musical skills.
Biggest surprise vs. your expectations pre-kid?
How much fun it would be. Really!
Most special moment as a mom so far?
When Maya came out and was a GIRL. I was absolutely convinced that she was a boy. That was such a surprise.